Everything had been going so well that I couldn't think of anything interesting to write about. Now I know to beware when it feels like nothing
interesting is happening. The Guatemalan school year ended in October with
Diego failing the sixth grade. I had told him that, if he didn't pass, he would
go to the same school as his younger siblings, now called the Green School
Antigua. He couldn't go there without failing the sixth grade so I was actually
pleased that the other school hadn't worked out. As the Green School is growing
with its students they were only up to sixth grade or "upper
elementary" in the Montessori tradition. I dreaded having to tell Diego
that he would be leaving his friends behind but, surprisingly, he didn't seem
to mind. He has settled in, has three teachers who all adore him. Two of his
teachers are men who are fluent English speakers and the other a Guatemalan
woman. Throughout the school day the students are required to speak English
with the English speakers and Spanish with the Spanish speakers. I had a
message recently that one of his teachers wanted to speak to me. Oh no, here we
go again. However, when I met with Maria she told me what a joy it was to have
Diego as a student. She said that he was not only very intelligent but a leader
in the classroom and extremely well-behaved. She reported that his mother had cried when she had told her the same thing.
I was in Mexico City when Diego made his way to my house to use
the Internet so he could send me a message that he had gotten ninety-four
percent on his math test. That was up from thirty-four percent at his previous
school. Maria told me that he had gotten ninety-eight percent on the national
math exam. Go Diego!
Diego's English has taken a huge jump forward. A few days ago he
told me that his best friend at school is a girl named Emily who is from
Denmark. He reported that they speak a mix of Spanish and English together. I
suspect that Emily gets at least some of the credit for the improvement in his
English. Go Emily!
Cris and Mishelle continue to be a delight. Both played recently
in a municipal soccer tournament. Diego, being a year too old to compete, was
given the role of assistant coach for the school. He took that role very
seriously but also ministered to his younger siblings during half time making
sure they had sufficient water. Cris's team only missed first place by a
kickoff to settle a tie. During one game Cris scored four goals. His Japanese
American pal, Jojo, scored the other four. Interestingly, Cris who is timid
about a lot of other things, is a ruthless soccer player. He is also a math
whiz and loves to be challenged with math questions. We routinely do math
problems at the ice cream store. How much is one sandwich and two cones and how
much change should you get?
 |
| Four goals each. |
One day I heard Mishelle reading aloud from an
interactive book on a tablet. She was able to answer successfully all of the
comprehension questions at the end and then asked for books for her upcoming
birthday. Books she got. It is sad that books are so hard to find in this
country. When I was her age I lived at the public library. Recently, Mishelle's
grandfather blessed me again and told me that Mishelle was reading to him.
Quite a feat for a kid who knows that her grandfather can't read.
 |
| Diego, the assistant coach with Mishelle and Cris and a smile not often visible in years gone by. |
Just about when I thought everyone was on track Estela, once
again, asked to speak privately to me. I knew that everyone over the age of
eight had an IUD so what could it be? Once again I wondered if Alex had been
murdered in prison. Tears rolled down her face as she told me that our star
student, Astrid, was four months pregnant despite having an IUD. Estela had
become suspicious and had taken the child to the same clinic that had installed
the IUD. They had confirmed the pregnancy and removed the still in place but
failed IUD.
I was devastated, furious. Clearly, she thought she was protected
but my concern was her apparent interest in casual, indiscriminate village sex
after three months in the United States. As with her sister the father was a
boy in the village. This one a candy seller who at least offered to take the
baby. How could she return from the picking cherries in Oregon, the Golden Gate Bridge, Broadway and the top of
the Washington monument to banging a local boy in the bushes somewhere. And at
the same time she was volunteering as a youth counselor with a family planning
NGO. Clearly, there was another side to Astrid and while I don't envy her the
consequences I was kind of pleased that she got busted.
Fortunately, I had calmed down before I saw her. Her mother had
reported that she was more afraid of me than she was of her classmates finding
out which they inevitably would. She was examined by the NGO doctor and sent
for an ultrasound which confirmed that she was four months pregnant. Astrid,
aged sixteen, and not even fully grown will be having a baby at the end of
June.
The first order of business was to deal with her school. On a
Saturday I messaged Astrid's favorite teacher from the previous year.
"Coffee today?" "Sure, everything OK?" "Nope, Astrid
is four months pregnant." "Oh God." Over coffee we hashed out a
plan to tell the school. Carmen called the Guatemalan principal and told her
that she had been approached by a student who found herself pregnant and
thought that the administrators would like a heads up. The principal contacted
the American director who was in his first few months at the school, a school
that had so far not experienced a student pregnancy.
The director's initial reaction was that Astrid should simply
disappear after Holy Week because of "a health issue." The school
would then continue to support her through home schooling. His approach was
reminiscent of New England in the fifties I thought but since, as he repeatedly
pointed out, I was not Astrid's legal guardian, I was not entitled
to an opinion. However, as word leaked out it was the Guatemalan parents who
raised a ruckus and came to Astrid's defense. No doubt someone also pointed out
that in Guatemala it is a human rights violation to deny a child the right to
attend school. Suddenly there was a shift in policy and Astrid was then welcome
to stay in class as long as she wanted to.
I went off to Cuba for a week or so and when I returned Estela
reported that the director had called her in and had her sign a letter along
with Astrid. I asked her what it said and, being barely literate, she said she
didn't know. She indicated that she had a copy and I asked her to bring it to
the house. I emailed the director and asked him how I could help in supporting
Astrid's home schooling. His rather curt response basically said that my help
wasn't needed, that it was a private matter. He indicated that I should just
come in if I wanted to discuss it any further so I set up a meeting for the
next day. I asked him if I could see the letter that Astrid and her mother had signed. He told me no, that it was confidential. I
reminded him that we were not in the US and that I had paid Astrid's bills
since she was five years old. He told me that I should ask Estela for her copy.
I pulled that copy out of my handbag and pointed out to him that it wasn't
signed by anyone other than a support staff person and that her mother was now
worried about what she had signed. He wasn't able to explain why the copy had
not been signed as he had indicated.
If the copy is the same as the signed letter it was to relieve
him of any responsibility for Astrid not attending class. It indicated that
Astrid was welcome to attend class or be on campus at any time and that it was
her decision to study at home and not attend class. As I pointed out to him she
chose that path after being told by himself and the principal that she would be
humiliated by other students and parents, that the school couldn't be
responsible, etc., etc., etc.
Another parent, Doctor Oscar, told me to go to an attorney and
get a power of attorney for educational decisions so that the administrators
couldn't shut me out any further. The attorney told Estela to go to the school
and ask if they would accept the power. Estela did that and explained that
since I paid the bills and was in a better position to guide Astrid in her
education she wanted to have an attorney draw up a power of attorney. Suddenly,
that was not going to be necessary and the school had Estela sign their own
document giving me the right to make decisions at the school for Astrid.
Astrid retreated becoming a recluse at their little home in San
Antonio Aguas Calientes. I suspected that she was so full of self-loathing that
she couldn't cope with anyone being nice to her. She alienated both myself and
Carmen, her former teacher. Carmen was able to persuade her mother to take Astrid
to the National (free, public, sketchy) Hospital as the child had disturbingly
high blood pressure. As luck would have it the first doctor she saw there spoke
English and Astrid told him, in English, all about her trip to the United
States. He told her about another patient he had had in similar circumstances
whose family wanted her to give the baby up for adoption. She insisted on
keeping the baby and was, at the present time, studying at a university in the US and the baby
had become the favorite grandchild of her parents who were raising it. I
suspect that doctor gave Astrid a ray of hope, an idea for her future.
Carmen and I both backed off each weary of the abuse from Astrid.
Carmen greeted her at school one day when she arrived to take some tests and
Astrid didn't acknowledge her. Astrid had told me not to come and collect her
from a class, that she would rather walk home. After a couple of months
realizing how isolated Astrid was, dangerously so, I started emailing some idle
chatter. It was fairly obvious that she was getting little support at home. Her
mother had told me of a single woman she knew who had twins. She sold bread on
the street during the day and studied at night. I guessed that was Estela's
plan for Astrid. She did not have the skills to understand what Astrid would be
losing by selling bread and not returning to the international school.
Eventually Astrid responded to my emails, at first, reminiscing about blueberry
pies in Oregon. Then she asked me for all the photos from her trip to the states.
While Estela didn't often offer any information without being
asked when asked one needed to set aside an hour. She told me that Astrid was
being seen weekly at the National Hospital because of elevated blood pressure.
And probably also because of her youth and small size. Perhaps thanks to that
first doctor who recognized that Astrid was not the usual pregnant teen the
staff had apparently taken up Astrid's cause. Estela had been referred to a
psychologist who had hammered in the notion that she needed to support her
daughter, that she was exceptional with tremendous potential and, given the
failure of her IUD, pregnant quite unexpectedly.
Thanks to that psychologist Estela and Jackie decided that
together they could help Astrid raise the baby. For some reason, despite
pleadings from many Astrid, who doesn't even like to take care of her nephew,
refused to consider adoption. Her mother and sister both tried to convince
Astrid that adoption would be best for all. I told her that she needed to do
what was right for the baby. Back doors adoptions with known families who would
let her have a relationship with the child were of no interest either. Estela
fretted that Astrid, because of her temper, would not be a good mother. We all
knew that she is bound to resent the child for interfering with her plans. Her
mother expressed fear of her daughter's temper at a later time if she forced
the issue, any issue. Estela understands that she will be raising the child.
So, in another month Astrid is having a baby by Cesarian section
due to her small size and the size of the baby. Amazing what nutrition can do
that wasn't done before and after Astrid's birth. She has emailed me that she
plans to keep the baby. "It is a personal decision." Further, she
explains that her mother and sister are going to help her and that she is
desperate to go back to school. So, with a bit of hesitation I sent the first
check to enroll her in the tenth grade started August 29th. Estela reports that
Astrid is now much calmer and happy. I suggested that she contact Carmen and
apologize to her and she responded that they had been in contact and the two had a plan
to get together. I have no such plans as seeing her older sister pregnant was
disturbing enough and Astrid is even younger. I will discuss conditions for
continuing school attendance and only pay monthly until I am sure Astrid can
meet those conditions. And yes, one is no further pregnancies.
 |
| Liam says "I don't have a father, I have Uncle Denis." |
Denis, or Tío Denis, as he is known to toddler Liam, is now
nineteen and will graduate from high school in October. I suggested that he
should think about attending university full-time in the city getting an
apartment with some other students. Needless to say he jumped on that idea and
his school is helping him with entrance exams and the admission process. Interestingly,
the enormous public university which is actually quite good schedules classes
either in the morning, afternoon or evening allowing students to choose based
on the work they find to support themselves and pay their school fees. US,
please take note.
